|Pic by Gashif Rheza|
The issue: it is rude to ask about someone's career
Today I was talking with a guy that worked with me in London and apparently we both lost our jobs. I had never talked to him in person but I found him on LinkedIn so I followed his profile. Later that day he sent me a message asking how my life was. After explaining him that I'm back in my hometown and that I am currently staying at my parents' house I politely asked him about his life. He told me he had started a business from scratch about something I don't remember. After that he asked me again what I was doing in Spain, and I told him I was just doing my thing here and there, nothing important in my hands at the moment. (I mean it's 2021, global pandemic, is it so difficult to understand that I haven't done much in the past three months???). He did not understand that I was trying to avoid the topic and he kept asking quite insistently if I was trying to get a job and if I had made any plans for my career. Well, there's no need to say that I found that conversation a little bit too importunate and I just ended up giving him vague answers until he gave up.
And I had never realized but that conversation made me think that making too personal questions to people you barely know can be unpleasant, especially because you don't know what I am going through in my life. It is important to learn to read between lines, to take the hints. I was just really trying to tell him I didn't feel comfortable talking about that.
So please, don't ask me about my career, don't ask me if I have a job. And, of course, don't ask me if I have a boyfriend (or why I don't have one), don't ask me if I plan to have kids or to get married. Because it really is none of your business.